You can’t imagine it, Jessie J says. At that moment gearing up for her comeback record in eight years, deeply enamored with her recent boyfriend, and finally the parent to a young child after struggling to conceive for a decade, feeling invincible. Suddenly in spring she was found to have cancer in her breast.
The artist, real name J. Cornish, is famous for speaking her mind. The album, her latest release, was meant as an candid account, tackling every moment of pain she’d experienced since she last worked on songs (a gynecological condition, losing a baby, failed relationships, emotional abuse, suicide) with typical candour. The initial release, the song No Secrets, was dropped in April. But by then there existed a huge secret. The cancer. Then next release, Living My Best Life, came out in May and she was giving interviews about how she was living her best life, while still secretly living with the disease. Four weeks after she disclosed her condition, and in July she received surgical treatment.
She gives me her best “What the fuck?” look. “I put out with a song called No Secrets. I’m doing every media appearance, and they ask, ‘So what’s new with you?’ and I respond, ‘Uh, nothing really’” Cornish has just had to postpone shows because she’s still waiting for reconstructive surgery.
Our interview takes place at a photography studio in the capital. She is dressed in a tan faux-leather coat, blue jeans with detailed white appliqués, cream boots and big frames. Picture motorcycle style meets vintage look. “As if I’m in the seventies and I should have a man with facial hair.” Like the film, I say, thinking of the film. “I was nicknamed that in school!” She beams. Jessie is sharp-witted, unfiltered and filter-free. She says she has always been interested in humor and is aiming for her standup debut next year. “I enjoy humor. During performances I often tease the crowd.”
Personal Battles and News
The artist was getting ready for an slot at the Baftas when she noticed an abnormality. “I promptly visited to get it looked at, had an ultrasound, and they said, ‘It looks like nothing; you’ve got really good dense breast tissue.’ And I was, like, ‘Yet I sense it. I have arm pain and tingling in my hands whenever I get up.’ And they said, ‘Well, let’s just do a biopsy?’ The date was March 28, the post-birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The specialist told her if it was bad news she’d contact on the start of the week. By then Cornish had persuaded herself it was okay. The way she tells it, it was just bad timing to get cancer when she had a busy schedule.
“We’re two weeks away from launching this thing after a long hiatus and four years without a single. And she [the doctor] texted and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I thought, ‘A video call, likely minor.’ So I join the call thinking it’s all going to be fine, and she says, ‘Are you sitting down?.’ That sympathetic voice? And she says, ‘Unfortunately but your reports have shown high-grade cancer cells.’” How did you respond? “I answered, ‘That’s unfortunate. The timing is terrible.’ Immediately I felt was, ‘My child depends on me.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She viewed the procedure terrifying and absurd. “I hate being put under. They lead you. During crises you roll down in a bed, but now I just marched with a hospital gown and my rear exposed. It felt surreal.” But, she adds, she’s been lucky. Without chemo or radio, just the procedure. “It’s terrible, but however I’m grateful it was caught soon. I had the mastectomy recently and my affected breast now looks like a fruit under fabric.” Another grin. “I got to keep the nipple, though.”
The follow-up procedure is both medical and cosmetic. Her boobs, she notes, are now “asymmetrical. The size doesn’t match. That’s impolite! I thought, don’t add insult to injury, I’m already having a rough time. Such disrespect! Amusingly I said I’d never get my boobs done because I’ve got perfectionism, and I know they’d never be flawless. Cancer ruined that plan.”
Previous Struggles
She is accustomed to medical issues. She thinks her attitude toward illness has been so optimistic because she’s used to medical emergencies. They have often coincided with peak moments, serving as a tap on the shoulder, or punch in the stomach, to remind her not to assume everything is fine. “Frankly, I feel fate says, ‘Enjoying yourself? Sit down.’ Since childhood, it has always gone alongside achievements for me; a major or strange event has affected my well-being.”
She reminisces to her youth, already starting her career performing in the London theater in Whistle Down the Wind (she was cast at the age of nine). That’s when she was diagnosed with the cardiac issue WPW, which can cause a rapid pulse as well as dizziness and palpitations. “I rehearsed between visits on an IV drip, and being readmitted at night.” She jumps ahead several years, and young Jessica has become part of the female band Soul Deep while attending the Brit School. “I secured a deal, and I had a stroke. Then when I was planning to release songs in the year 2020 I had a automobile accident and my throat was injured and I was unable to vocalize for a long period.”
Oi, I say, slow down, I need a moment. You really had a stroke at 17? She nods|agrees
